Sunday, January 10, 2010


dear dearheart,

yes.

i can tell by the momentary tightness around my chest, feeling as if the world sits squarely on top of my breastplate, bending my ribs ever so slightly, that you are strained.

i can feel you want to stretch, to reach out, and beat as wildly as you would love to do.

but you can't. and as i feel now the blanket of melancholy, i can hear Portishead on loop yet once again. as beautiful as that album is, do you really want that to be our soundtrack?

i want to feel life. i want you to beat harder, push the letters by our ancestors through channels sacred where only we can decipher the encrypted secrets. i don't want to feel numb. so instead of feeling the pain around you, dearheart, i push legs harder, tear muscle, gasp for breath because i have this yearning to run through grassy meadows, feeling the breeze against my cheeks, until dizziness bless me with the feeling of life.

hold fast. don't seek. let all things heavenly and blessed come to you. beat wildly regardless. love hard though it is never returned. pour out because you will always overflow. don't keep it to yourself. and remember remember remember, that all things lost manifests itself in some other form.

transform.

transform matter into energy, and use it to evolve love.

beat wildly and free, but never, never, bleed.

love,

alfie

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Dear Alfie,

That momentary tightness you are feeling is from acid reflux due to me trying to figure out why you had that spicy burrito for lunch. And sure, I would like to stretch and reach out but right now I need to help your body deal with this fiesta you created.

BTW, Portishead is alright.

As for feeling life instead of dizziness, breathe in through the nose for 4 seconds, hold for 7, and then breathe out for 8 seconds. Repeat several times. That will help you and me to relax a little bit.

And when I manifest into another form, I want to transform into a keychain, the bottle opening kind, but a good one though, so I can enjoy good times with young people opening bottles of beer, and when they get old and don’t use me anymore, I want to end up in an antique store where I will be noticed by another young person who will buy me and bring me joy once again by putting me to good use.

Also, while I would love to beat wildly and free, you keep me locked up in this damn box with no heat, no light and not even a simple hello or how are things going. So no, I won’t bleed because I can’t see where to cut myself and I don’t have a knife.

Love, Heart

alfie bo balfie said...

whatever, Heart.

i put your ass in a box cuz you don't listen to Head.

Let's just face it; it's just me and you, kid.

alfie

Anonymous said...

"The mind lies, the heart does not. The mind can mis-interpret what the heart says, but the heart never lies. The heart always says what it feels, what it wants, what will make it happy and content forever. The mind only sees short-term relief; it tells you what you want to hear and often interprets the language of the heart to your fancy. The heart hurts, and it tells you everything but it’s still your choice as to your reaction and whether it is mature or not depends on the owner. The heart will eventually stop talking... if you stop listening. It won't continue if you continually batter it and damage it every time you fail to listen correctly. The heart has to be listened to..."