rolling with a pregnant woman

an aim chat at 1am:
Alfie says: fucking aye!!!
Alfie says: i want a cinnamon roll
bunnysahtva: lol
bunnysahtva: are you sure you're not pregnant?
Alfie says: sympathy pains
Alfie says: sympathy cravings
Alfie says: aaaaaaaaaaaah you suck
Alfie says: i eat like a pregnant woman lol

rolling with a homie who is pregnant is an interesting situation. i instantaneously have an eating buddy, at all times. no matter what time of the day, no matter where i am at, if i want some conversation with my meal, i can always rely on vanessa.

it's cool. i mean, from time to time, vanessa would aim me and say "hey! baby's hungry! let's eat!' in fact, for awhile we had a period of time where we were rating all the steak nachos in the greater los angeles area.

and then, she gets cravings...

cravings
sounds like a dream come true? right, it can be. until cravings kick in. one night, we had dinner. i don't remember when and what we just had, but it was definitely was a hearty meal.

"i want ice cream!"

ok, well, i don't really eat ice cream cuz being that i am asian (and i use that in the loosest way possible cuz many of you out there know i relate more to "pacific islander"... ok, asian enough to where i am lactose intolerant). i protested lightly. next thing i know, we are heading to westwood for di di reese's.

ok, di di reese is this place where you can get a huge ice cream sandwiches made with huuuuuge cookies for only a buck.

i ceased to protest. besides, i wasn't going anywhere that night so i can be happy and gassy at home.

anyways...

we ate it.. and after the hearty meal, and the ice cream sandwich...she wanted a hot dog.

so i take her away before we had a hot dog for dessert.

the cambodian donut
as we drove away, she said, "baby wants a donut."

"you have got to be kidding."

"no, i want a donut. don't lie, you want a donut too."

"ok, fine, well there is one right there.'

she looks "no, that sucks. i want a donut from a cambodian"

((Pause))

me, "whhhhat?"

"it has to be a donut from a shop owned by cambodians"

( loooooong pause )

"whyyyyyyyy?"

"cause it tastes much better than the regular donut shops. its something about the oil"

(((pause, well, by this time, i am just cracking up)))

we pass by pink's on melrose...

"oh loooook! hot dogs!!!"