Monday, August 30, 2004

my instincts are a tad off
i took my shot at interpreting my dream. normally, i feel good about what i come up with but sometimes, i just want to be sure that i am looking at a situation with clarity.

so i talked to my friend tanya who does dream interpretation. she is very intuitive and she can give me some insight on what is going on. my double take on my intrepretation was valid.. look what she says...

"you are standing on the target point...x marks the either move forward or get out of the way so that someone else can self-launch from that point and many loose ends...unfinished business, why??? fear of success or failure? fear of vulnerability or losing control? lack of self-confidence is obvious (u knew how to sail a boat but forgot)'s easier to 'forget' a skill than to exercise it...selective amnesia can be a very powerful form of self-deception...your window of opportunity is open, your Guides are trying to get that across to have the tools necessary for success...go into the toolshed, gather up all the tools, sort and organize them...create your plan/blueprint...begin building on your dream...your life...when your window closes, you'll find it even harder to merely think, let alone, plan"

so, my interpretation was from a perspective of a fearful person. its true. i am completely independent. basically, i call my own shots, i make my own schedule, i do what i want to do.

and it scares me sometimes.

there are so many times when i would stand in the wings of a stage, waiting for my cue when i turn to a stage hand and say "omigod, i can't do this!'... or when someone passes me a job in which it is high profile and i call my sister to vent "what? am i nuts??? this is so difficult" or when a gorgeous guy comes up and talks to me but i don't give him the time of day cuz i think i am out of his league.

been working on it lately.ever since i finished "the power of now", i have been taking a concious effort in not making fear debilitate my being.

so here's to letting go of the illusions of choppy waters, grey skies, and broken masts. gonna set sail now...

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