on rotation: LTJ Butkem live in Tokyo
sippin': a cup of coffee
burning: nag champa and vanilla candles
wishing: to be at home with my dog

i ... am... so... sleepy. i am so incredibly tired. feeling a bit... uninspired.i resorted to a cup of coffee to get my juices flowing but instead, regrets are flowin'. coffee is bad for me. my chinese holistic doctor told me that. my healer told me that. shoot, my mom told me that. but she is like me. after she tells me it is bad, she gives me $20 and tells me to go how and get the both of us a soy latte. haha! i love you, my coffee addict mama!

i was sitting her chatting to kat ( we do this everyday. we chat and daydream during times when our jobs are just too unbearable) and we were planning the college tour of Poorhouse Projekts, Balagtasan Collective, Full Blown e., and Kiwi . since kat is too busy doing FPAC: Festival of Pilipino Arts and Culture, i decided to try to help as much as i can as far as booking and organizing goes while production of the magazine i am working on is slow.( besides, my two partners in the magazine venture also involved with FPAC.)

(( whew)) there is so much we have to do. media kits, press kits, photoshoots, making of products, contacting venues, pitching to them, scheduling artists by their time. add writing, rehearsing, and perfecting to that list. afterall, i am an artist too and i can't neglect that aspect if i want to perform. most likely, since i will be more so representing BC, i need to produce works that are indicative to the community and society. i can't be doing pieces on love all the time. that is the challenge for me- is to write a piece that is community minded and at the same time personal. there is a balance there. anybody can regurgitate information they heard on the news, in their books, and even through other people's poems. i need it to be from the heart. one good advice that don dada told me is " never bullshit your audience. they will know. just make sure it comes from the heart and they will better appreciate it." i feel that i have done that with "rendered... speechless", the poem about my dad.

oh well, i am not going to worry about it. i am not going to force myself either. if it comes to me, it come to me. my muse must come on her own cognizance.