reading:the way forward is with a broken heart by alice walker
listening: bjork
breathing: in santa monica
sporting: my jesus jacket


i just came back from lunch. it was freezing outside. the sea breeze of santa monica is alot chillier than the desert air of the valley. i had to come inside, though i tried to brave the chill factor so i can read my book. i am only on the first 100 pages and already i am hooked. a wistful look on a look back on a a love lost, a letter to her former lover, husband, friend. (( sigh)). i don't mean to get all wistful but her sentiments are so heartfelt. her prose is so touching and sweet. many of what she wrote, i have said in my head to my mental letter to my ex.

we have been talking lately. it is nice hearing his voice, his words of encouragement, his well-being. we never dare bring up the past. i dont it is not that painful to reminesce but we just don't take that path. he has once asked if he was controlling. i told him the truth and told him so. he apologized and said that it was a trait that he is working on.

i called him the other day and a woman answers the phone. for a hot minute i froze but thought to myself, "aaah who cares!" it ended up being his sister who i went to college with. we spent a whole fifteen minutes talking before she handed the phone to him. "you're family, alfie. you always will be." it brought a lump in my throat. i miss her. i miss his family. i miss the good times. but i , like the book, on the way forward, with a broken heart.. but i am healing... nicely...

joined the staff of verbalisms.com
roc of verbalisms.com just sent me an email to join the staff of this progressive site for hip hop's forgotten face, the [womb]myn. what an honor!!!!! i am waiting for my assignment. aleks told me to becareful that i don't spread myself too thin. i won't. but i do believe in the cause. i believe in the causes in everything that i do. big ups and an even bigger thank you to roc for considering me!