Tuesday, December 10, 2002

sportin': osiris skate shoes, indigo jeans, dickies hoodie
speakin': mantras of HIS name so that my manifesto can manifest
seein': fuzzy metaphysical sight making eye numba 3 sore
sellin': the idea that maybe swirling currents can be settled thru gravity

gravitate to me:
i woke up feeling outta sync. i didn't sleep well last night. i normally don't because i am a proud member of the insomniac club ( I AM NOT ONLY A MEMBER. I AM THE PRESIDENT...). but last night was definitely different. i woke up to somebody screaming my name. i distinctly FELT my name. i didn't necessarily HEAR it, but i definitely felt it. it was a bit uneasing. i remember feeling anxious and sad. like i needed to do something but i had no clue what it was. i dismissed it as dream but i couldn't get back to sleep and i carried this feeling throughout the day.

i have a lot of empaths in my life. whenever i find myself crying in my room, my friends are there with no fail. "everything okay, alf?" "i was thinking about you. i wanted to check up on you."

never fails...

and i wish i can be as clear as my metaphysical friends. i KNOW something is wrong and what kills me is that i can't really pinpoint who it is...

i actually have an idea but i have no clue as to how to approach him. it is kinda awkward...

well, as i throw this to the universe, i hope he hears me. or maybe he is reading this right now...

i feel you. i don't know what you are going thru. i don't know how to make it better or if you want me to be involved but know that i feel you. and whatever value you make of this, i am here for you. you feel this. i won't leave you feeling alone because you are far from it.

hmm.. there. i feel an inch better.

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