Monday, October 06, 2003

You may be thinking about political or social matters today, ALFIE. Specifically, the deteriorating state of our planet may be occupying your thoughts. You may be worried for your future and especially for that of your children. You might try bringing up the subject at a social gathering. Someone you meet there is bound to teach you something about this issue. If you feel the need to get further involved in raising people's consciousness of this issue, by all means do it!

that is my horoscope for the day. i do have alot on my mind. certain recent events and performances has bungee'ed me back to the past. things that i have forgotten. things i was asked to forget. things that i was begged to forget.

i remembered the day when she told me. she was looking out the window, avoiding my eyes. her eyes were glossy but her stature was strong. i held her hand.

she told me every single detail. i remember the hate, building in the pit of my stomach. i remember wanting to drive to his home and do unspeakable things to him. how i wanted him to cry and beg for forgiveness and make him feel what it was like to be victimized. i remembered her tears disappearing and then welling up in my eyes. i remembered her squeezing my hand and saying "don't cry." i have never felt hate as i did that day.

i remember her telling... and how she had to retell her story over and over and over again- to the teacher, to her parents, to the cops, to lawyers... and no one did shit for her.

this shit has got to stop

i remember. fuck. i remember. things are clearer now.

sorry for the downer... streams of conciousness, remember?

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