oh, please don't let me be jaded. please don't let the price of wisdom blanket over the fire. let me feel inspired. let me rediscover. let me keep at it.

i was chillin' at my folks house and i found pics of myself. i was a much happier person. i am not depressed, nor chemically imbalanced. i believe that i was much more happier because i didn't know what struggle was. i didn't know what being hungry was. i live in a constant state of comfort.

but knowing what i know now, i want to live life outside of the comfort zone. there is so much more to gain if you have so much more to risk. but because of this, i am in a constant state of flux and this is the price of keeping my creativity and making dreams into reality.

but with any hardship, the battles toughen the skin. so much that you don't feel anymore. and i don't know if that means i am getting jaded in things. i remember living idealistically. i remember my dreams of utopia. but what does that mean when you mix the realistic factors in?



still figuring shit out, my friends. i guess i just miss smiling a whole heck of a lot.but know this, when i do smile, it means a lot more than it did before...

pee and poo




stuck on gift-giving ideas?

then go to: http://www.peeandpoo.com/eng/flasheng.asp


oh those eurpeans

don't worry...its work safe

Broken habits

I used to blog like a fiend. I think it all started when I worked at my second job and my designs went thru its normal stages of approval way too slow. I needed something that would seem like I am working but would allow me to process the thoughts in my head. Nothing sucked more than being at a job where creativity is not being used. You feel drained over the monotony of things.

Tippity tap tap of the keys.

But then I started blogging. Where my employers thought I was busy coding a page, I was discussing about metaphysics, the mystery between two people sharing chemistry, a freestyled poem.

And I did this for years.

I have noticed that I did this during my return of saturn. Coincidently, I questioned a lot of things, meaning I also discovered a lot of revelation.


Now I don’t blog as much. I am thinking it is because I do not work at an office and the only time I spend on the comp is because of work or if I am contacting someone miles away. In fact, a lot of times, I want to spend time AWAY from the comp as possible.

That.. Or maybe I am now putting into practice the things I learned from my return of saturn.

Phenomena whoa


There is this new phenomena happening around my life. I constantly experience de ja vu with people I bump into in events or at the streets.

I'd stare and stare at them, thinking I would know them.

"hey, do I know you?"

"do you do spoken word?"

"did I go to college with you?"

Leaving these people to think that I am trying to pick up on them, only to realize it is some fucking reality show star.

See it seems like these participants are all coming to los angeles- inhabiting in this city, these reality show people. Going to the restaurants, going to movie screeings and QnA's, shopping at trader joe's

Scenario 1:
My sister and I were at the sushi bar. In comes this girl who my sister was like "dude, did you go to school with her? Didn't you all fight?"

And strangely enough, I couldn't place her but I had this residual dislike for her.

After 15 mins of mad-dogging and trying to place her, I realize.

Oh shit.. Its flor from miami real world.

Phenomena whoa


There is this new phenomena happening around my life. I constantly experience de ja vu with people I bump into in events or at the streets.

I'd stare and stare at them, thinking I would know them.

"hey, do I know you?"

"do you do spoken word?"

"did I go to college with you?"

Leaving these people to think that I am trying to pick up on them, only to realize it is some fucking reality show star.

See it seems like these participants are all coming to los angeles- inhabiting in this city, these reality show people. Going to the restaurants, going to movie screeings and QnA's, shopping at trader joe's

Scenario 1:
My sister and I were at the sushi bar. In comes this girl who my sister was like "dude, did you go to school with her? Didn't you all fight?"

And strangely enough, I couldn't place her but I had this residual dislike for her.

After 15 mins of mad-dogging and trying to place her, I realize.

Oh shit.. Its flor from miami real world.