i should take up golf just to beat this bitch in her own game


read her interview here

"This is probably going to get me in trouble, but the Asians are killing our tour. Absolutely killing it. Their lack of emotion, their refusal to speak English when they can speak English. They rarely speak. "

"If I were commissioner, I would have a quota on international players and that would include a quota on Asian players," Stephenson told Kessler. "As it is, they're taking American money. American sponsors are picking up the bill. There should be a qualifying school for Americans and a qualifying school for international players. I'm Australian, an international player, but I say America has to come first. Sixty percent of the tour should be American, 40 percent international."

full circle...
its been surreal. it's hard to grasp the reality that joy is gone. one minute she is journeying thru the rugged terrain, taking a plunge at an adventure that only most of us dream of. and now she flutters in the stars. rest in peace, joy de la cruz. you are such an inspiration and we love you. you are so missed right now. i will always remember your poetry.

we are music
by joy de la cruz
there's a quote:
he who doesn't hear the music thinks the dancers crazy
well i say,
he who doesn't hear the music is just being too lazy
to listen
to hear
to be here

we are music
in our sashay or strut or walk
we are music
in what we say and do and talk
we are music

let me drop a freedom writer line to clarify con fusion:
music our muse for being
human beings have hearts
that hear art
and i know in my heart
the true gift we give each other is simple
to be present
be-at the moment
the beat

be-at, the beat
be-at, the beat
be-at, the beat

----------------------------
the hope
the same day i learned of joy's passing, hazel called me. "you are going to be an auntie... TWICE". the tears continue to roll. they just mean something different.


celebrate life, mi gente... celebrate

i love you

2+2=5
shit just don't add up...

ok, so cell phone is broken. no internet connection at the pad. haven't got my dsl package in the mail yet.

i am so disconnected.

i feel like a nomad.

oh yea, VOTE NO ON PROP 54 AND ON THE RECALL.

Dear ALFIE,
You may be thinking about political or social matters today, ALFIE. Specifically, the deteriorating state of our planet may be occupying your thoughts. You may be worried for your future and especially for that of your children. You might try bringing up the subject at a social gathering. Someone you meet there is bound to teach you something about this issue. If you feel the need to get further involved in raising people's consciousness of this issue, by all means do it!

that is my horoscope for the day. i do have alot on my mind. certain recent events and performances has bungee'ed me back to the past. things that i have forgotten. things i was asked to forget. things that i was begged to forget.

i remembered the day when she told me. she was looking out the window, avoiding my eyes. her eyes were glossy but her stature was strong. i held her hand.

she told me every single detail. i remember the hate, building in the pit of my stomach. i remember wanting to drive to his home and do unspeakable things to him. how i wanted him to cry and beg for forgiveness and make him feel what it was like to be victimized. i remembered her tears disappearing and then welling up in my eyes. i remembered her squeezing my hand and saying "don't cry." i have never felt hate as i did that day.

i remember her telling... and how she had to retell her story over and over and over again- to the teacher, to her parents, to the cops, to lawyers... and no one did shit for her.

this shit has got to stop

i remember. fuck. i remember. things are clearer now.

sorry for the downer... streams of conciousness, remember?